The Latest With Me

Could you forgive someone who cheated on you?  I've asked the people that I associate with and some say that they can forgive and forget, while others find that even though they are eable to forgive they can't forget and that creates a barrier between their significant other. 

I find that I am able to forgive, but I don't forget.  I don't have it at the fore front of my mind 24/7, but i just learn to let go.  I find that I am able to  love that person just the same.  It hurts sometime just as it should, but I've learned not to duel, because when you duel you only torture yourself, and I feel that it gets in the way of truely building trust with the significant other again. 

I ask this question, because people say that I am stupid for being with someone that has supossidly cheated, because mind you this is only by ear, I've always believed that if you don't see it with your own eyes then the information might not be true.  Although, they might be right, but it's hard to determine that when the person delivering the message doesn't like the person you are with.  So after thinking it through I forgave him.  I kept this to myself and surprisingly I find that it does not in the least bother me.  I've seen good relationships go south due to a mistake, and stubborness.  Personally I have learned to ignore what others say, because I realize that when it is their turn to be in love and stay with that person no matter what they wouldn't want to be judged even though they judge me, because I realize that narrow minded people can only relate when it affects them.  So can you forgive someone if they cheated on you, whatever the circumstances may be?

Want To Give Up?

Have you been driven to the point where you just couldn't take it anymore?  Have you been driven to the point where you were ready to give it all up? 

I'm stading on the edge and all I want to do is walk away.  I ask myself does that mean that I'm giving up after fighting so hard and for so long?  I know I love him, but will that translate to him thinking that I don't love him?  Why are relationships so complex?  When a woman accepts all aspects of you as a man then why do men push them away.  Is it because their a good woman and they don't want them to be stressed, but that's the thing in a relationship you give up the I for an US.  i find myself wanting to stay and make our relationship work and grow, but that choice is being taken away everytime he decides to leave.

We can't control others actions that are not our on, but thats not fair to the ones the choice is being taken from.  I want to love someone who loves me, but loves even when times get tough whether or not I am the cause or he is the cause of the tough times.  Unfortunately, time isn't always on your side, but giving ultimatums can backfire...so do I close the door emotionally to my heart and walk away or do you stay and wait patiently hoping that things will change?

Tick, Tock...What's your answer?

Physical Vs. Emotional

Is cheating phisically worse thann cheating emotionaly?  Now I  just think that it's a trick question.  Both are just as bad.  When you are intimate with someone emotionally if things get too ugly it can ruin both parties involved.  When you become emotionally attached like lets say by giving them your heart and they break it you feel, weak, vunerable, you feel like a fool; a misguided puppy.  Now when they have your heart and they give their body that once used to be the physical contact of your love then you feel angry, cheap, and at times insecure,  Whether it is cheating physically or emotionally don't do, because then you are only setting yourself up to get hurt.  Why would you want to put your self in a position where you would then have to choose between your love and your lover?   Like all things in life some things just aren't simple and it sucks unfortunately, but thats the way that it is.  in the end it's a matter of choice and whether or not you can live with it.

Double Standards

Can women do what men can do?  In teen relationships who has more to lose?  Women always have more to lose than men and it's a known fact.  When a couple splits, it's ok for the guy to move one as quickly as he wants, but if a girl does it then she's wrong for not waiting.  The same thing if someone is single.  A man can have multiple partners and he is seen as being a player, but if a female does it then she's considered fast, a tramp,  or whore. 

Women are suppose to be dignified, and have morals of self respect.  Women are suppose to meet "good" men through friends, and all that jazz, and yet, it's ok for men to have all the fun and go out parting, drinking, and trying to hook up with as many women as possible. 

LISTEN

Women are always complaining that men don't listen.  Let's reverse the roles!  Women need to listen to their significant others!  Why?!  Well, because men have things to say and they also want to be heard, but it's not so simple.  My sister and I have had the pleasure of having our lovely boyfriends be upset with us, because we weren't listening.  Now, there is a difference btween listening and listening to the person and actually giving a damn.  Now we all have those people in our lives, who are always talking to us, but we learn to tune them out. 

It's fair to say that when men here us talking so much they tune us out and the same goes for females.  As females we have to learn to be "understaing".  I'm just joking, we all have double stanards that we keep when we want it to benefit us.  What I'm trying to say is if we want men to do simple things for us then we have to be able ti give that back in turn. 

Busy at Work

Bushwick's youth are on the move.  Through a local community organization called Make the Road New York, these you are being inspired to become our future leaders.  Currently the youth in Their local communtiy oraganization have been working to try and pass a bill called the Student Safety Act.  Currently in New York city schools students do not have any way to report misconduct by School safety Agents without fear of retaliation.  School Safety Agents are trained by NYPD and yet they are not held accountable in the same way. 

Students are told to report any misconduct to the IAB (Internal Affairs Bureau), but how can anyone report a cop to other cops.  The Student Safety Act is going to utilize the CCRB (Civilian Complaint Review Board).  Some may say that," but it doesn't work well."  That is true, but by passing the Student Safety Act it will be a step in improving the CCRB as well as providing a safe, anonymous way to report any misconduct by School Ssfety Agents.  The DOE (Dept. Of Education), and the NYPD both have to report quartely to the City Council Members about their findings.  This allows raw data to be public for the community so that the people can see what is really going on  in their childrens schools.  The youth have voiced loud and clear that they are students not criminals and ould like to be treated as such.  It is time that they people of NY listened and became a part of this fight that will benefit not only students in NY, but across the states. 

The youth of Bushwick have been busy at work holding press conferences, having lobby visits, rallies, and getting 26 signatures signed on to the Student Safety Act getting the majority of votes.  The youth of Make the Road New York are on their way to victory and they are not going to stop.  These are the future leaders of tomorrow.  NYC youth holds potential for greatness and it is time that we came together in support of that.

 The following clips talk about the Student Safety Act.  I hope  that they are both inspiring and informative.

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-dAsEFguls

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_VlL05uwG0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ECL5A0cu0c

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vu-a0wOx940

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otJqZspn4RA

Love's Trials

What do you do when the person that you love feels that they are not good enough for you?  How are you suppose to react when the last thing you hear them say is I am not good enough for?  When does the viscious cycle of blaming ones self end before the pain consumes us whole?  Well, you can simply do nothing or you can choose to fight to stay.  When you are with someone, who is in constant need of reasssurance, you need to let them know that they are good enough, that they must give themselves credit for all the things that they have done in their lives.  Encouraging your significant other helps the relationship to grow.  You have to learn to become each others support system.  Between the two, you both need to know how to balance each other out.  No.  No it is not easy, but that is what is so brilliant about it, that is it not easy.  I mean ladies honestly, if a guy was that easy to be with what would he have to foofer you?  i prefer someone that I can go through the ups and the downs with, because I know that when it is all said and done, I will know that we did things together, and that he won't split the minute things get too hot. 

Ladies let me tell you, sometimes I have to reassure my boyfriend, because he's insecure about himself, to the point that I feel so drined and exhaughsted, but you know what it is worth it.  Why?  Well, when I go home and I get to lay next to a warm body at night, because I stayed and fought to make our relationship work and you find yourself alone; you can tell me that wanting things to work isn't worth it.  No one wants to be alone.   We all want that special someone to protect us while we sleep, embracing us in their arms.  Why wouldn't you want that?  Yes, there will be dramma, but here is NEWS for YOU, there will ALWAYs be some type of drama going on that you two will eventually have to go through, it's simply wheather or not you choose to go through it alone or with someone you love.  I would rather work through the drama then to risk losing someone I love and risk not havong him at all.  YOU are CRAZY to let a good thing pass you by.  This is for my LADIES and Gentlemen.  Do not ever let a good thing pass you by.  Do not allow someone you love to slip through your fingers, because in life we cannot carelessly disregaurd, or take for granted that ones that we love and care about, especially your significant other.